This is my Unreality.

I felt it was appropriate to post here for this kind of situation, so here it goes.

I was planning on going to Europe with my family this summer.  Not immediate, but first-level relatives (cousin, aunt, uncle) with whom I'm close to.  They'll be going to Paris and London, two places I haven't been since I was nine years old.

Well...now they'll all be going, because I can't.



This morning, my cousin who is the primary trip planner, called to ask me for my passport number.  I don't have one.  I've been trying to get one but I didn't have money for it.  Everybody else in this family has a passport but me because they've all been able to travel overseas for the past few years, while I've been stuck at school.

It's not fair, but life isn't fair.

Here's my dilemma: I went to two post offices today and they both said I had to make an appointment for applying for a passport.  The closest available appointment was this Friday.  I don't have this Friday to look forward to - my cousin wants my passport number NOW but I have none to give him!

My friend also suggested that I just mail in my old passport, the money, photos, and the application to the government and have it expedited.  Now that sounds like a grand idea but here's the other kicker in the ass: I haven't renewed my passport since I was ten years old.  The only way I can get it renewed by mail is if I got my last passport when I was sixteen.  Again, I haven't been able to travel overseas.  The only places I've been were within the continental U.S. within the past decade.  I've never had the need for a passport.

It sucks because my family just sprung this trip on me and like, I can't even go.  All I wanted was to go buy some goddamn Laduree macarons and go to Versailles.  Is that too much for a girl to ask?  We don't have these kind of things Stateside.  And like, now...I can't even.

I've been waiting to get money for a passport.  I'm jobless, so I had to wait for my mom to give me the money I needed for the stupid application, but she insisted that I buy a trenchcoat last week (which I didn't even get. I had to get groceries for the family with that money instead).  So no fancy trenchcoat for Europe, and no Europe in general.

This sucks.